One day I'll do the history of art thing...
More about Simon's unique career path
I left school utterly baffled about my future. At 15 I'd tried and failed to become an apprentice mechanic with a motor-racing team. By 16, I thought my career problems would be solved by becoming Joe Strummer.
Must try harder!
Disastrous A-levels (two Es and an F, ouch) saw me lose my place at the University of East Anglia to study History of Art (and to have a completely different life in tweed and corduroy), so I trained as a primary school teacher.
Four years later, I was damn sure I didn't want to be a teacher. More happily though, I'd married my childhood sweetheart Sheila (we're still married with two grown up children!).
From DHSS to NHS
Six months of clerical work in the DHSS were followed by a terrifying five years in public relations then I trained as a nurse. My wife and lots of friends were nurses, so that made sense didn't it? I wasn't terribly good, but tried hard and learned a lot. Meanwhile I filled notebooks with poetry and short stories, managing to get a few published.
Nearly a decade later, I quit the NHS to try writing professionally. To everyone's surprise, I started to get hired all over the UK by agencies, including one terrific one where I became creative director.
Read more >Getting more creative
From there I started learning about and advising on brands and brand strategy. Quit to set up my own consultancy in 2005. Joined up with another cool agency. Got restless again and re-invented my own consultancy as Brand Strategy Guru.
Now I'm a lucky bunny. I speak at conferences all over the world and have helped develop brands for fantastic clients like The Broads national park, Anthony Nolan, The Earth Trust and more.
I get to go on TV quite a lot, talking about brands on Newsnight, BBC Breakfast, Today, Bloomberg, CNN and lots of others. I was also writer, presenter and co-producer of The Brand Effect TV specials and was the expert brand adviser in the Channel 4 series Duncan Bannatyne's Seaside Rescue. View some video clips.
I'm now writing my third book, Brand New You. My first two books, Build A Brand In 30 Days (aimed at entrepreneurs) and What You Need To Know About Marketing (aimed at corporate executives) are quite popular. Read more about my books.
That's all good, so I tried my hand at developing a major tourism attraction in Norfolk in depths of recession. Not quite so good. I'll put that down as a 'learning experience'.
The Sound of Music
To prove a point about branding, I founded the world's only proper left-handed musical instrument business Left Hand Bear in 2010 and it's growing like Topsy!
At the weekends I jump about on stage as lead-singer and guitarist with Americana band The Proposition. This started as a hobby, but we keep getting booked for festivals and receiving glowing reviews: It goes to show that whilst you can be too old to rock'n'roll, you're never to old to alt-country. Read more about my music.
And I teach occasionally at UEA where I'm Brand Leadership Fellow (which gives me enormous pleasure when I think about my A-level debacle).
One day I'll grow a beard and do the history of art thing.
Get in contact with me >